Going For Gold

Have you ever wondered what it would be like if flirting was an olympic sport? Odds, on, probably not but now that the question has been raised, do you think that you would be awarded points for technique or merely for the outcome? Would it be like your high school math tests where you could get marks for demonstrating the right approach even though you didn't end up exactly where you had hoped to or would the winner be determined by whomever managed to actually hook up and in the shortest possible time?

And just to clarify a few points here, by flirting, I don't mean tricking people or using them and by hooking up, I don't mean finding someone to go home with or even spend the rest of your life with. Flirting is a skill we all use to make other people feel good and to make them interested in knowing us. It just so happens that it is also damn fine way to get a date but you may just want someone to take a little more notice of you. You may want to make a new friend or just see someone else smile but that is occasionally easier said than done.

The best flirts are actually those people who can do it without thinking and without exerting obvious pressure on those around them. They are the people who know how to set up a physical rapport with someone. They know when to mirror body language, how to send positive signals and where to put their hands during conversation. Great flirts also know how to use language and vocabulary in order to identify with another person. They realise that the subtle things can make a big difference and are aware of how to use that to their advantage.

People conversant in the art of flirting are those who often have a high level of self-confidence, but for those of us who are unsure, are we more likely to end up with the wooden spoon than a grand prize? Some would say not if you can fake it till you make it. Just like an athlete who must train to become successful and proficient in the field they have chosen for themselves, flirting is something you can practice to improve your level of skill. Unlike sport however, you can still be successful whilst also being self-conscious. And even better, the more you do it, the less self-conscious you will eventually become.

So what does this all boil down to? Basically that no one is a lost cause. Anyone can start small by making eye contact or smiling and everyone can learn the habits of the masters that will help you ease your way into social situations. It may just be a good thing that flirting is not a competetive sport (at least officially) but you could still look at it as a life skill worth developing. The more you learn and give it all a go, the more you'll actually get out of life anyway and you never know, you may turn out to be a real champion.