Call It Like It Is

They say that a rose by any other name would smell as sweet but does that also hold for people? Are there really meanings which reflect the person or is it purely coincidental that my friend and I have dated different people of the same name and have had somewhat similar experiences? Do people actually choose partners or choose not to be with others on the basis of their name? These are all questions that I have asked and have still not found the answers to.

I first started thinking about this when I met a guy named Tom. We got along well and contact details were exchanged. The next time I spoke to him however, he was kind of sheepish and said he had something to confess. Apparently his name wasn’t actually Tom. It was Harry. He was very apologetic about the whole thing though and explained that it was actually necessary to mislead me on the night. What I found interesting however was that when he was asking if that was alright, he seemed to be asking if I minded that he had a different name rather than the fact that he had lied.

Unfortunately Tom-who-was-Harry-and-shall-now-forever-be-known-as-Dick and I have not stayed in contact. I can say though that it had nothing to do with his name. Quite frankly I find that a rather bizarre concept. I suppose I could understand someone being attracted by a surname (I know a girl who almost thought twice about turning down a date when she found out the guy was a ‘Brosnan’ of the 007 ilk) and there are plenty of people out there who chase those who have household names but still…dating someone just because you’ve always wanted to go out with a ‘Ryan’?

On the other hand, after seeing someone who we’ll just call Wally and hearing all too familiar tales of woe from my friend who had her own Wally, if it ever looks likely that I’d hook up with someone who also shared that name, I would be doubly cautious. I would not dismiss them out of hand and I am aware that my reaction to their name would not exactly be fair but no one ever said life was meant to be. It sure would be convenient sometimes if it was easier though.

But since relationships can be a bit of a battleground, I had a thought. I have heard people say that your name says a lot about you so in the interest of efficiency, maybe we should just add sub-headings.