Bridal Mags Have A Lot To Answer For

So I actually bought a bridal magazine the other day. With the actual intent of using it for ideas and contacts. Not that I have bought those types of magazines before for any other reason but you know, they have always been “those” magazines until now. And I must say for the most part that they are a wanky waste of money! They all seem to be geared towards those sugar puff brides who are happy sailing along in their blissful cocoon of nuptial nuances, planning the last detail of the happiest day of their lives with their one true love / soul mate / divine other half or whatever description seems more kitsch and well, vomit inducing sounds a little strong but you get what I mean.

In case you hadn’t noticed, I do not see myself as one of those sugar puff brides. Nor do I actually believe that my wedding day is going to be the happiest day of my life. I’d like to point out that this is not because I don’t love the person I am going to marry but rather that I’m hoping to have a rather long life filled with family and friends and if the happiest day of my life happens before I’m 30 and I live till I’m 80 odd, then that means its really all downhill after the wedding then anyway. Cynical, I know, but The Boy isn’t marrying me for my sentimentality and romantic ideals so its all good. And since we already have one of us in the relationship reveling in the significance and emotion in all the details, if I joined in then I’m sure no one could bear listening to us both talk about the wedding without wanting to gag so its all good.

That’s not to say that I don’t care at all about the details but lets just say I have a slightly different outlook to the whole thing than The Boy does at the moment. A girlfriend asked me how things were going the other day and I told her that as far as I’m concerned, as long as the girls are all carrying something and the boys have buttonholes then I’m satisfied for the flowers. Churches usually come with some sort of arrangements anyway and the reception venues usually sort something for the tables and I don’t much care what that happens to be. The Boy on the other hand wants big flowers. Everywhere. He’d concede to my attendants just carrying a small bunch of flowers but he wants a florist to do my bouquet. Just like he wants a cake decorator to make the cake. I’m all like no one is going to remember what the cake looked like a week after the wedding and unless you are actually serving is as the dessert, people won’t much care if its not the most sinful and decadent thing they’ve ever tasted in their life either. I’d prefer to have an extra person at my reception than fifty bazillion tiers to the cake and lots of intricate icing work. But marriage is all about compromise so we’ll probably end up somewhere in the middle.

Just as for the most part, I am the girl in this relationship but sometimes he really does it so much better than I do. We were having a chat last night about some of the vendors we’ve seen and the ideas we liked so far. We were also talking about bridal parties cause over the last couple of months, we have been asked to be part of one, asked to step aside, asked back and, well, it didn't work out in the end. Anyway, I was recalling the sickeningly saccharine article I started browsing through in one of the mags that went something like…once the engagement has been announced there will come that time…for the bride, this is one of the most important decisions that she will have to make…the bride might ask you out to lunch, just the two of you, and say “we’ve been friends a long time”…then comes the question… And The Boy was sitting there saying that he thinks he’s finally decided who he wants to be his best man but he thinks he needs to make absolutely sure first. If he does go with gut feeling though then he’d need to take his mate out to lunch, spend the afternoon with him and ask him properly etc. I was all like I’m just going to email my girlfriend and ask if she’ll be a bridesmaid :-). And thats just what I did.

I told her my sister will be my maid of honour but I would really like to have her there if she was able. At the moment, since we don’t have a firm wedding date, I said I'd understand that that possibly would make things quite difficult for her. She is in another country after all. I advised we have a suggested date of 07/08/09 which is a Friday in winter (thus making the reception venues a little cheaper) but thats as far as its gone. The date is kinda cool too so I’d like to go with that but as I say, its not final and may well change. Not exactly overly sentimental but it was functional.

So yeah, considering we don't even have a date at the moment, on the plus side, I think I may have found my dress. Wouldn’t have a clue what to put the bridesmaids in but first things first. The dress I like is definitely not traditional and The Boy actually came with me when I tried it on but he has told me a dozen times since then that I looked really hot which was kind of what I was going for so we’ll see. I’m going to try and get mum and The Pussycat to have a look when they come up for the engagement party. As much as I do care what The Boy thinks, I really would like a second opinion from a female or two. Its all very well to make a spectacle of yourself in front of all your family and friends when its your wedding day but theres part of me that wants to be reassured that it would be a good choice nonetheless. Also, if I did decide to go with the dress I’ve tried on, I think my mother would like to make the decision with me. I have to get her here first though. She is a three hour drive away after all.

You know, I can just tell I am going to get frustrated with the whole thing over the coming months. I’ve only just scratched the surface and I’m pretty over it.