Old Maid

Well its more or less official. I am now the old maid of my college girlfriends. The last single one left. The sole object of pity and platitudes on finding a partner that always seem to contain the words ‘time’ and ‘eventually’. Or maybe ‘fish’ and ‘sea’. Actually I’m really not that bothered and I don’t feel pitied at all but I am still going to be the unmarried one for a good while yet. Not that this is actually much of a distinction as we were really only a group of four but when I did hear the happy news at the end of last year that my friend Gina was over the moon to accept a marriage proposal from her partner, it did cross my mind that I’m now on this particular limb all by myself. Well, compared to the others that is. And as I said, its not really that much of a distinction anyway.

The first one of us to grow up and settle down did so a couple of years ago. As she was actually also the first of all my close friends to get married, it was kind of fun and novel – and now she and her husband are also the first to start on a family, well that’s kind of fun and novel too. The second to leap out and spread her wings to fly beside another, definitely didn’t do it by halves. She moved to England and married a South African. Her Australian friends of course had a few things to say about the fact that we didn’t get enough notice to be able to attend the wedding but we all wish her well anyway. Now Gina has been the next to succumb and will be tying the knot at the end of the year. Not that this actually changes much.

As is the case with a lot of my friends today, they live with their partners before they marry them. They may already own assets together and the only real difference that a marriage seems to make is the dent it puts in their bank balance for the wedding. This is not the case for all certainly but definitely the majority. I always find it interesting what people find important though. I am admittedly a romantic and if I was going to spend my life with someone I’d want to be married to them. I’d probably want to be married sooner rather than later if I was sure as well. There are some people however who don’t want this. I have some friends who have pretty much decided that they don’t want to get married together for the rest of their lives. I think that takes commitment too.

As for myself though, I’m yet to come across the decision. I’m not actually concerned that I’m turning into an old maid however. There is more to life than being married for some. There are marriages that fail and love affairs that last a lifetime. On the other hand, if you don’t happen to find one or the other, thats really not the end of the world either.