Deal Or No Deal

That cute guy you’ve had your eye on for a while finally asks you out and when you’re sitting down to dinner, he reaches over and eats off your plate without asking. You sleep over at your partner’s place for the first time and can’t miss the floor to ceiling porn stash on prominent display in their bedroom. You’ve been dating someone you seriously think is ‘the one’ and they propose with a cubic zirconium engagement ring…Deal or no deal? We all have standards and prerequisites that we look for in a partner, even if only sub-consciously. Some things are not immediately apparent however so you may find yourself on a date or even in a relationship with someone before you end up hitting on one of those things that you are not prepared to put up with – no matter how hot they are. Basically when you come across a deal breaker.

Maybe you’re having the ex’s discussion with your new boyfriend and you learn that not only do you have several ex-boyfriends but he has several ex-boyfriends as well (if you happen to be hetero). You could be really excited to have a night on the town as you haven’t been on a real date in ages and when your ride turns up in jeans and sneakers he takes you down the road for a slice of pizza. Or you might have agreed to go on a blind date as a favour to your best friend and you find yourself in the company of someone who says “I can’t believe how great this is going. After that first phone call, I thought for sure I’d be outta here after the first drink”. Its those things that inspire the “oh-oh” closely followed by the “na-uh” (is there even a conventional spelling for those sounds??) that leave you in no doubt you will not be dating that person again.

There are actually all sorts of things that get classified as the epitome of the no-go zone. For some people its an action such as cheating or lying, for others it may be a physical characteristic such as having too much hair (or not enough in certain places). It may be a habit they have such as smoking or cutting their toenails in bed. It may also be a circumstance that is unfortunately beyond their control. Whether its something that others might think of as ridiculous though or a requirement all your friends happen to share, most deal breakers are pretty much non-negotiable. Which can be both a good thing and a bad thing. For those unwilling to bend, it may be the thing that saves years of heartache or alternately costs you the love of your life.

Then again there are those who’s so called ‘deal breakers’ are a lot more trivial and a lot less absolute. Which probably really means they’re not so much deal breakers as dislikes or pet hates. I have never given someone the arse because they use copious abbreviations in emails and sms’ for example but I can tell you that it happens to tick me off. Maybe thats just me though.