Welcome To The Playground

They say it’s a jungle out there but sometimes it would seem a little more apt to refer to it as a jungle gym. Some may feel that it is (or should be) quite straight forward to go out, meet someone, and (if you like them) start seeing them. Others may feel however that there are truly a series of tasks or obstacles to get both through and past before you can even think about seeing that particular someone for the second time. And it all starts with the approach.

For some, it is not the worry of being tongue-tied in conversation that is terrifying but that initial approach. Should you use a pick-up line? Try to start up a conversation? Just jump into a conversation? All methods can be successful but most require the confidence to carry them off. And then we come to the way you act. Should you come across as super confident and assertive or as being somewhat relaxed about the whole thing?

And I’m not offering any answers here cause I’ve never quite figured it out either. I do know though that in any pick-up, it is as much the delivery as the line and one always hopes not to get a put-down in return. I like your approach, now lets see your departure. There really is only a small window of opportunity to make that first impression and the aim is definitely to keep the window open as long as possible, or better yet, have someone open the door. But then the next challenge starts. Conversation.

This is not as simple as it sounds either. You want to entertain someone and not bore them stupid and you want to amuse them but not offend them. Not necessarily an easy task if you know next to nothing about them. During the course of your conversation you may also need to navigate through the drink buy which some have found upsets their rhythm and throws them off completely. Between deciding who’s paying (possibly) and going to the bar (probably) you can easily lose momentum. If you do manage this without a hitch though, there is still the number get.

The question here is do you offer yours, ask for theirs or suggest an exchange? Would you trust them to call you or would you rather ensure you had the option to call them? And are you confident that you could pass the first phone call challenge that results from it? Sometime during the first meeting, there may or may not be a first kiss challenge which is a whole different ball game but that first phone call, usually made completely sober can be make or break. And I think I’ve managed to fail this one before too.

So for anyone out there who feels as though they’ve ever had to jump through hoops, welcome to the playground.