Pole Position

Well I’d have to say that in the seductive stakes, pole dancing is one of those things that seems to rate right up there. For years, many men have found it incredibly sexy and now more and more women are getting past the whole 'whore vs angel' thing to try it out. As one of the best abdominal and upper body workouts around, it has become one of the latest fads to hit the health scene and there are now schools in just about every capital city. From recent experience however, I can tell you that learning how to pole dance is probably one of the least sexiest things I have done in a long while and the way I ‘dance’ at the moment would definitely not be considered attractive.

Imagine if you will a room full of women strutting around silver poles in the terribly fashionable attire of running gear and stilettos. Intense concentration on their face as they coordinate inside leg then outside leg, and sneak glances at what everyone else is doing to make sure they’re not the only one who feels like a fish out of water. Picture chaos when everyone seemingly hurls their upper body into a rigid object, legs flailing, clangs resounding and choruses of laughter and pain ringing out amongst the group. Then see them get up and do it again, worrying that this time it might be worse and overcompensating because of it.

Its actually pretty funny to watch. And it does get better. What initially may have seemed impossible the first time it was tried, eventually clicks and the end result does look quite impressive. As you learn more and more ‘tricks’, both coordination and confidence increase, as does stamina. The concern that this time you really are going to somehow fall off the pole also dissipates and you no longer constantly end up in the strangest contortions of arms and legs which more often than not, are also decidedly uncomfortable. At this point however you may still need to deal with various injuries.

For most women, pole dancing will utilise muscles that rarely get a good workout in day-to-day life. For me (since taking up this activity came after months of inactivity) it was my forearms and my chest that were in agony after the first lesson. This made the task of pulling on my pants and taking off t-shirts somewhat difficult. Kind of inconvenient really when you think about it, not to mention the fact that I looked like a git whilst attempting to manage it. That went away after the first week though and since then I have been dealing with the rug burn (we practice over carpet) and the almighty bruise I scored on my knee.

All in all though, I have managed to master a few moves and I’m having a lot of fun. Even if I am a little black and blue in places and have seriously considered avoiding underwire for future classes, I think I would no longer completely embarrass myself in public, which is good. At times each lesson seems an exercise in dodging self inflicted pain and not kicking my classmates in the head accidentally but they just might make a polestar out of me yet. And since a number of guys seem to like that sort of thing, it might just help now mightn’t it?