A Dubious Honour

Like many women I do periodically suffer from the ‘why wasn’t it me’ affliction. This is more often than not, a totally pointless exercise where something happens to your best friend, your work colleague, the person who happens to be standing beside you or just about anyone else really and one of your main responses is to bemoan that fact that it didn’t happen to you. It could be about something significant like a promotion or a bonus, or about something so ridiculous, it should actually be embarrassing. Like getting felt up in a nightclub. What? I’m not attractive enough? Why’d everyone else I came with get touched inappropriately!? Stupid but true. I’m not proud here, just sharing. Basically because I got to be that girl on the weekend.

I headed out of town on Friday and got to enjoy the happy hour at the hotel I was staying at and the evening meal on the company tab. I then went out to sample the nightlife and within about ten minutes or so, some enterprising guy decided to cop a feel. As a female, I think I’m supposed to be morally outraged by that. Perhaps have a rant about the objectification of women – or tell you that I punched his lights out or something to that effect. Nothing that exciting happened unfortunately. I basically just turned around and laughed at him. And a small part of me does actually hope that he at least enjoyed it because it sure did jack for me. That way it wasn’t a complete waste (although that’s very un-PC I know).

Of course, it might have been a different story if I hadn’t partaken of a little social lubrication prior to going out or if it had actually happened to one of my work colleagues and not to me. I can get a little aggressive on behalf of other people. I once endeavoured to claw a guy who refused to let my friend go in a bar and I sincerely hope it was painful. On the weekend however, I wasn’t really that fussed. More bemused I think by the fact he’d gotten that fresh and where it wasn’t at all crowded. This definitely does not happen to me very often. I guess I know why people do it, I’ve heard commentary from sociology and psych majors before but I must admit that I still don’t get it.

To my way of thinking, what do you actually accomplish in a couple of seconds that makes it worthwhile? The fact that you did it so your mates know you’re capable of feeling up some random female? Woohoo! It sure as hell isn’t going to improve your technique with women, that’s for sure. And personally, I would think that in this day and age, that there is the very real potential to get the crap kicked out of you for this kind of behaviour. More and more women are taking up kick-boxing classes and the like and we are all told that we don’t have to put up with unwanted attention so there is in fact a good possibility of the guy coming off second best. Before another male steps in on her behalf. Each to their own though I guess.